"Greetings. And welcome. Welcome to Papa's house."
―Papa John
Papa John H. Schnatter
Papa john
Name Papa John H. Schnatter
Species Human
Gender Male
Alignment Neutral, but with some Bad aspects
Allies/Friends Beau Schnatter (possibly-abused son), The first d-delivery drivers to deliver Papa John's, our new internet site today and we're proud of them
Enemies N/A
Goals Buy pizzas and sodie pops for his son Beau
Other Attributes N/A
Status Alive

Papa John H. Schnatter is the founder, former spokesman, former CEO and chairman of the board of pizza company Papa John's (which is better than Domino's and Little Caesars, no question). On July 11th, 2018 Schnatter resigned as the chairman after using the word "n*gger" in public.[1]


Papa John

Papa John's first appearance was when Ethan goofed on his very cringe-worthy ad for his updated website. In it, Papa tours his 40,000-square-foot mansion with a giant gold dragon centerpiece, and orders a pizza with his son, Beau, who awkwardly raises his arms and says "Beau's in the house", and goes off-script every 5 seconds. Ethan suggests the possibility that Papa John actually abuses Beau off-camera. Then a deliveryman named Matt gives them the pizzas, and Papa John says "And I gave you your tip?" (Ethan concludes that tip means the pizza worker's in reality minimum salary) Beau runs off with the pizzas, because wacky family fun antics. Legends say that to this day, Papa John still doesn't know where Beau ran off with those pizzas.


  • Papa John actually doesn't drink sodie pops. He lied to us all.[2]
  • When Ethan and Hila appeared on First We Feast's show, Hot Ones, Ethan said that he'd love to meet Papa John in-person.[3]
  • In 2012, an infamous decision made by Papa John was made, not paying for his workers' healthcare due to Obamacare, which caused a lot of criticism.
  • In late 2017, Papa John was outed as CEO of the company following some controversial comments he made about falling sales being caused by NFL protests.[4]